View Full Version: Vice & Virtue

Sonic Rapid Board > FanFiction Zone > Vice & Virtue



Title: Vice & Virtue
Description: My second fanfic! Critique, please! :D


BlueRush - November 10, 2005 08:38 PM (GMT)
user posted image

((Note: Homunculi in title are subject to change; Lust, for example, will probably not be the original, and since MF called Hope I'll give her a chance to make a better one before I add her in. And it begins...))

The North. A single train made its way slowly across the landscape, weaving in and around the sunlit meadows. From high above it appeared alive, deceptively flexible for such a metallic contrivance.

From close up it appeared alive as well. Inside, the inhabitants of the train were spirited and animated, talking excitedly and gesturing vivaciously. Only one car in the train appeared to be less than lively.

“Stupid train. I’m really getting sick of these things.”

“Brother, just relax a little. I know you’re sick of being on this train, but I’m pretty sure our stop is coming u-“

“You said that three stops ago!!”

“Well, there’s no need to be so short with me.”

“WHAT DID YOU SAY?!”

As the train pulled into Hindlseim Station, an illusory feeling of peace seemed to wash over the new arrivals. Stepping out of the train, Edward Elric yawned widely. “Finally! Thought we’d never get off.” Carrying his bags in his left hand, he moved away from the train, looking through the crowds for-

“Winry! Hey, Winry, over here!” called Ed as Al came out behind him. “I think you dented my head,” he said meekly, feeling his hollow head. Then Winry, hearing Ed’s words, made her way over to them. “There you guys are!” she said. “You’re lucky I was nearby, Ed. Don’t think I would’ve come all this way if it wasn’t on my way back from Rush Valley. And what did you do to it now?” she asked, grabbing his right arm. It lay dead in her hands, limp and unmoving. She rolled up the sleeve to reveal that it was not, as it seemed at first glance, a human arm, but rather one of metal- and rather damaged metal at that.

Ed pulled it away from the shoulder. “Ahaha, nothing, just a, err, little scratch!” he said, sweatdropping under the murderous gaze of his blonde friend. “Ehe, hey Winry, how about we take you to an automail shop or something, so you can calm dow- OW!”

Ten minutes later, on the steps of a local automail shop, Al was still chuckling as Ed rubbed the big red welt on his head. “Darn it, I meant before she hit me with the stupid wrench… Winry, you done yet?” called Ed into the store.
Winry sighed, and tried unsuccessfully to see Ed through the pile of stuff in her hands. “I need all this stuff to fix your arm. Maybe this’ll teach you treat your automail better next ti- Oooh, is that the new X450 wrench?” Eyes shining, she ran over to the last full shelf in the store.

Meanwhile, above the city loomed the Briggs mountain range, peaceful in the morning light. But just as the commotion and bustle of the village of Hindlseim was faded as viewed from the mountains, so was the sight of the galacial cliffs.

“Take this, you freak!” screamed a man, firing a machine gun. His target was a man on the edge of a ledge. He was dressed in a clean white suit, with blank eyes swirling in their pearly depths, incomprehensible and lucid. The bullets blasted into the man, smashing into him powerfully, and wordlessly the man leaned back and disappeared over the edge.

The other man, clutching a small bag that clinked and clattered as he moved, lowered the machine gun, breathing heavily from a fear releived. He was safe- his crime committed, his witness and would-be capturer dead. But he ran anyway, as criminals will do, not from his assailant but from justice itself.

Unfortunately for the criminal, the man in the white suit was Justice itself. Standing almost horizontally on the edge of the cliff, he appeared to be standing sideways on the wall as his wounds rapidly healed. Within seconds he hoisted himself up, and launched himself at the fleeing criminal, killing him before he knew what had hit him.

Justice was a homunculus, one of several created in the Northern land of Drachma. Now, however, he looked out upon a new land, one undoubtedly in need of some ‘positive reinforcement’….

((Comments? Criticisms? Anything? Comment peeps!))

GoldenSama - November 10, 2005 09:10 PM (GMT)
:3:3:3:3:3

AWESOME! Heheheh. That line with Ed and Al and "don't get short with me" -- PRICELESS!

And Winry + Wrench + Edward's Head = :D

And Justice: mucho awesome-o. Melikes. Melikes a lot. ^o^

Your Score: <(^o^)> <(^0^)> <(^O^)> 3/3 Happy Kirby's. (That's good! XD)

BlueRush - November 13, 2005 12:06 AM (GMT)
This one's a bit long. ^_^ Hope you like it!

user posted image
PART I: BALANCING THE SCALES
CHAPTER I: THE FESTIVAL AT HINDLSEIM

A cave on the southern end of the Briggs mountain range is known to the villagers below as “Wrymgrotte Cave”. Overlooking the diminuative far northern village of Hindlseim, the cave has been a well-known aspect of the mountain pass for generations, though its depths have never been fully probed by any villager.

Deep, deep down in those depths, amid the dripping and creaking sounds a cave will make, a single lantern served to light only its holder. “Massster,” wheezed the man throatily. “The Plan A wass a complete sucesss.”
The man lifted up the lantern to his face with grungy hands whose gloves left his dirty fingers open to the air. The dim light lit merely a white mask with no openings. “Your lures worked perfectly. Hoenheim did exactly as we expected he would. The girl died, they sealed her soul in an object, and when I built a homunculus from the remains, they transsferred the ssssoul.”

His body seemed to shift underneath a huge unwieldy trenchcoat which rendered his features indeterminable. “The girl found me out,” he croaked, “But she seems to be fully functional…”

He turned his face, eyes unseen, to his adressee several feet ahead in the pitch black. Though it was too dark to see, one could sense a figure rising, and a grim smile somewhere in the dark. A smooth voice, glittering in the darkness like poisoned honey, extended out from the darkness.

“A homunculi with a human soul… certainly a triumph. But remember that a homunculus has a counciousness of its own, even if it cannot be called a soul… we shall have to see if she survives the conflict before we can declare it a complete success.” The man paused, and there was a sense of contentment, as a great lion settles down for a nap. “Wonderful. And the second?”

The man in the mask, stock-still like a statue, emanated noise. “A partial successs. He has his old personality, if not his soul. But it could have been that the foolss wassted the power of the sspecial Red Sstone you gave me on trivialities…”

“And Plan C…?”

The man lowered the lantern with his unkempt hands. “Of the choices, the homunculi Lust and Greed were killed… We could try to bring either of them back, but I am out of sacrifices, and alchemists to do it. Have you…?”

Another, crueler smile could be felt from the man in the darkness. “Have you forgotten what tonight is?”


It was a bright summer day in Hindlseim, and the three friends walked along the city streets. Ed moved his automail arm gingerly. “It still feels creaky, Winry,” he said. “I still think you should’ve done it instead of the guy at the automail shop.” Winry held up her nose and looked away poutfully. “Like I told you before, I don’t have adequate supplies here to properly--”

Ed growled. “Not enough supplies! I bought you the whole store!” stormed Ed. “Sheesh, you’re getting more and more grouchy each time I see you…” He flinched for the onslaught he was about to get for that comment, and…. Nothing. He looked up. Winry had already walked on ahead. “What’s up with her, Al?”

Al looked at Ed over the top of the large box he was carrying. “I don’t know, brother. Maybe it’s just because she’s a little stressed, or--”

“Helllooo, foreigners!” cried a little old man, leaping out in front of them from an alley. “Come from out of town, have ye?” he looked up at Ed, standing on tiptoe just to look at him with a gigantic monocle. “Mmm, did you lose your legs in the war, boy?” asked the old man creakily.

Ed’s eye twitched. “Are you insinuating that I’m less tall than I could be?”

“No, of course not,” said the geezer quickly, tossing his knobbled cane into the air and catching it. “I’m saying explicitly that you’re a puny little runt! Hehe!”

Steam came out of Ed’s ears. “WHY YOU LITTLE- LOOK WHO’S TALKING, YOU- YOU-” Al had to put down the box to hold Ed back. “Sorry mister, Ed’s a bit sensitive about his height. Ed, you can’t beat up an old man!

The man leapt on top of the box. “Or lack thereof. But you boys are getting me off the topic.” He leaned in towards them, peering at them through his monocle. “Do you tourists have any idea what tonight is?”

Ed opened his mouth to say something rude, but Al put his hand over it. “No, mister. What is it?”

The short little geezer lifted his arms into the air. “Tonight… is the Fest of Wyrmopfer!” he shouted grandly, speaking darkly. “Do you know what happens on Wrymopfer? Do you know of the tragedies that have occurred, of the horrible deaths that will take place in this very town, of how close we will all avoid destruction? No?”

Al was mesmerized. Ed rolled his eyes and looked away.

“Well, then I’ll tell ye,” the man said darkly. “It all started long ago, long before anyone can remember. A villager of this very town committed a vile sin, using his witchery to create a terrible beast which escaped and ravaged the town, killing many. Its rampage did not stop until the legendary Paras the Wrymstreikender drove him into the mountains. But it was not enough. We are still paying for his sin today, for every seven years, on the seventh day of the seventh month, the dragon returns to demand a sacrifice of seven beautiful maidens upon threat of the destruction of us all.” The man finished with a flourish.

Ed was skeptical. “If it was so long ago that nobody remembers it, then how come you remember it?”
Al was entranced. “B- but today’s the seventh day of the seventh month! What if it’s-”

The man finished his sentence grimly, “Aye, sonny. The seventh year. And now, in that building right over there,” he said, pointing with his cane to nearby town hall, “they be choosing the seven maidens who will be sent up the mountain to that cave,” he pointed again, up the mountainside, “and will never be seen again. I beleive they're choosing the last one now, actually.”

Al started to panic. “Brother, we can’t let this happen! Come on!” He started running towards town hall, and Ed ran to catch up. “Al! Wait! Come on, you don’t actually believe that old fart, do you?! He’s insane! And much shorter than me by the way,” he finished, reaching the steps of town hall alongside Al. Al opened the door. “How do you think they choose who gets eaten by the dragon?”


“B-7!” cried a man at the front of the hall. “Does anyone have B-7?”
In front of him was a hall full of young girls sitting at long tables, a couple of whom placed markers on cardboard squares in front of them. The man turned the crank on a spherical metal cage in front of him, containing a large number of marked ping-pong balls, and when he stopped, one came out and he read what it said.
“I-34!” cried a man at the front of the hall. “Does anyone have I-34?”
Suddenly a girl in the middle of the crowd burst out in tears. “I- I got BINGO!” As she wept, the people around her patted her back and comforted her.

Ed stared. “I- I don’t believe I’ve ever seen a life-and-death stakes game of Bingo before.”
The bingo spinner got up and led the last winner out the door, past the Elrics. The others cheered and started to leave. Ed stopped one of them. “Hey, is this Fest of Wrymopfer thing real?” he asked. The girl shrugged. “Well, people call it WrymFest nowadays, but yeah. Why?” Before he could answer, a huge cheer came from outside. Seven disconsolate and depressed-looking girls were loaded on top of a wagon. “Now!” shouted the man from the bingo hall as the last girl climbed atop, “We begin WrymFest by sending these seven sacrifices off to the dread dragon, for it is the only way to save our town! May god favor these children as the dragon rips the flesh from their bones!” The townspeople, now a large crowd around the wagon, cheered, and the wagon started down the road.

“This is nuts!” cried Ed. “Are you kidding me? That guy couldn’t have been telling the truth, right Al?” Al was staring at the group of townspeople, some of whom were now dancing to cheery violin music. Others were buying t-shirts and hats shaped like dragons. “I don’t know. Something sure is weird about this whole place.”

“Weird? You betcha!” said the old man, appearing suddenly at Ed’s side. Ed jumped. “You again!” said Ed disgustedly. The old man shook his head. “It’s a crying shame. These people have to stay awake all night long, drowning their sorrows in fun, lest the dragon attack again.” The geezer sighed dramatically. “Oh, if only there was someone brave enough to go defeat the dragon and save those poor girls. Ah well,” he finished, walking down the steps. “You wouldn’t be tall enough to beat the dragon anyway, so don’t worry about it.”

A vein in Ed’s temple pulsed. “What did you say?!”

The man turned around slowly, smiling with rotted teeth. “I said you’re too small and weak to even think about fighting the dragon. You should drink more milk.”


“Stupid old man with his stupid stupidity, with his dragons and caves and bingo…” muttered Ed, making his way up the side of the mountain. “We can beat any stupid dragon, right Al?” Al followed, leaping from rock to rock. “R-right… br-brother, you don’t think there’s really a dragon up here, do you?”

Ed stopped and seemed to think about it. “Wait, hold on- what I am doing looking for a drag-”

“EEEEEK!” came a screech farther up on the mountainside.
“Come on, Al!” cried Ed, running toward the noise. Several more screams came, and as the brothers approached the ledge, they could feel the heat of a fire. Then they climbed up on the ledge.

There, at the mouth of a gaping cave and on a large ledge overlooking the village, were the seven girls sitting in the wagon. Above them, a huge fiery creature was twirling and roaring, swirls of red and blue forming a ferocious dragon. The summer night sky was lit by the monster’s brillance as it swooped toward and away the girls.

“Omigosh! Ed! We have to do something!” said Al, looking up at the dragon. Ed nodded. “But not about that thing. That’s just fire and ice being twirled around through the air by an alchemist. Look closer.” It was true; on second glance it was clearly not a flying creature but merely the air being alternatively sparked to make fire and frozen to make ice, imitating closely the appearance of a dragon. “And there he is.” Ed pointed toward a boy not much older than Ed in blue and white clothes moving his hands through the air. “Hey, you! Leave them alone!” shouted Ed, running toward him and clapping his hands. He slammed his hands into the ground and it cracked, the tiny faults rushing for the alchemist’s feet and uprooting him, sending him collapsing to the ground. The dragon seemed to melt itself immediately without his control, drenching the seven girls in water.

“Hey!” said one girl. “You got us all wet! What’d you do that for?”
“Are you kidding me? I just saved your lives!” objected Ed loudly.
Another girl screeched, the same scream from before. Heard closer up, it seemed more like a fangirl scream than one of terror. “Ooh, do it again! Yaaay!” she clapped.

The alchemist got up and dusted himself off. “Hey, what’s the big deal, buddy? I’m getting paid for this, I can’t let you mess me up!”

Ed let his jaw drop, standing agape. “Wha…?”
A girl in the wagon giggled. “I bet you’re from out of town, right? Did that old man Terrysias trick you into thinking this was real? Hee hee, he does that every year to some bonehead foreigners- no offence.” The girl said cheerfully. “See, every year we imitate the ancient legends by sending seven girls up to the mountains while an alchemist we hire sends a creepy fire dragon flying over the town! It’s loads of fun with dancing and treats and-”
The girl who had won last interruped. She looked like she had been crying. “And it’s way boring up here. We don’t get to have fun or anything. At least he was entertaining us, until YOU came along.”

Ed stood with his mouth wide open, unmoving. Al walked up to him from behind him. “Heh heh. He- he sure got us good, eh brother?” said Al gingerly. Ed exploded, blushing furiously. “WHEN I GET THAT OLD MIDGET, I SWEAR I’LL--”

He never finished that sentence. A dark, low growling sound emanated from deep inside the cave. Suddenly, the ledge was shaking with the force of footsteps as something lumbered towards them. Before anyone had a chance to react, a long, serpentine creature with a large, fangy mouth like a lion’s and terrible claws along its side burst out of Wrymgrotte Cave, spouting fire from its mouth.

“Oh snap,” said the alchemist in blue, turning pale.

((READ and REVIEW, por favor!! :hs: Pwease? I'll give flan to the first person to guess who the alchemist in blue is...))

GoldenSama - November 13, 2005 04:13 AM (GMT)
QUOTE
“Stupid old man with his stupid stupidity, with his dragons and caves and bingo…”


XD My God I love that Elric's boy's lines. Hilarious!

:D The fanfic, she is gold BR-san! Pure, solid gold! That whole festival thing was great, and as always, pointing out Ed's hatred of milk was pricelss. :P

You MUST write some more soon; I'm counting on it!

As for the alchemist in blue.... hmmm....

if it's a REAL character from FMA, then the only alchemist in blue I know is the Colonel -- Roy Mustang. If it's a ORIGINAL character, then... umm..... Burburry? David Burburry? The alchemist who you've teased us with but never actually shown? Is he finally coming? :D

BlueRush - November 13, 2005 04:25 AM (GMT)
I'm glad you liked it, GS! ^_^ I thought I did a much better job on this one-- I just pretended I was RPing! XD


QUOTE
if it's a REAL character from FMA, then the only alchemist in blue I know is the Colonel -- Roy Mustang. If it's a ORIGINAL character, then... umm..... Burburry? David Burburry? The alchemist who you've teased us with but never actually shown? Is he finally coming? 

And the flan goes to....
GS! WOOT!

Yep, 'tis him. ^_~

And I would like somebody else to critique on this thread before I post the next one, but I'll probably do it tommorrow in any case. :D

GoldenSama - November 13, 2005 05:22 AM (GMT)
Oh! Question BR-san!

Around what time does this fic take place? Like, early-series? Mid-series? Or late? Is it before the whole incident with Greed and all them? Or do you have no clue? I was just wondering.

BlueRush - November 13, 2005 05:30 AM (GMT)
Uh, well, it's after the whole Greed thing- basically it's taking place up to what I know. XD I was afraid someone was going to ask this, because I'm not really sure- I would like the Greed thing to have happened though, for Al/Martel.

PM me if you have questions about Greed II and origin stuff. ;)

GoldenSama - November 19, 2005 04:17 AM (GMT)
"Something semimeaningful."

XD LMFAO

Eh hem. This kind of pointless, random, spammy post is NOT allowed; but I had to post it for BR-san so he could post the next chapter. >.< Since I know better, I'm-a increase my warning level as punishment. XD

BlueRush - November 19, 2005 04:48 AM (GMT)
user posted image
PART I: BALANCING THE SCALES
CHAPTER II: OUT OF THE CAVE

The dragon roared, raising its reptilian snout to the sky in a bitter and terrible cry. Shaking its wide mane in fury, the creature’s snakelike body whipped into action swiftly, rushing at the boys amist swirls of spurted fire from its huge nostrils.
“Agh!” cried Al, leaping out of the way of the beast. “What is that thing?!” he said frantically. “I didn’t know there was such a thing as dragons!”
Ed stood his ground as the dragon rushed at him. The creature circled around him, surrounding him with its serpentine body. Ed clapped his hands. “It’s not a dragon!” he said, smashing his open palms to the earth. Suddenly with a flash of blue light a rock smashed out of the ground, knocking the beast in its mouth.

The creature roared with fury, and Ed ran towards it, clapping his hands again. “It’s just a chimera!” He extended his metal arm away from himself as it became a deadly blade. He jumped up into the air, and smashed the blade into the dragon’s scaly face. The dragon recoiled, but it was unharmed; Ed fell back to the ground.
Al and the boy in blue were at Ed’s side. “Oh, NOW I’m not worried,” said the boy in blue.

Al ran at the creature, launching a huge punch at thing’s head. Then he hit it again, and again. The creature stepped back, away from Al, roaring in pain. Then its nostrils started to spout smoke.

Ed ran towards Al. “Get outta there, Al!” he said, tackling Al to the ground just as the dragon spurted fire out of its mouth. Unfortunately, the other kid was in the way; fortunately, he was ready. Raising his hands to his necklace, the alchemical array inscribed on the tiny blue jewel began to glow, and as the fire rushed towards him, the air around it froze and the fireball fell to the ground, a block of ice.

“Nice,” grunted Ed, getting up and standing next to the alchemist. “Who are you again?”
The alchemist struck a pose. “I’m David Burburry, the Sapphire Alchemist!, the second-youngest State Alchemist in history!” he said, flashing his watch.

“Great,” said Ed. Suddenly the monster bellowed and leapt at him, his teeth seizing on his metallic left arm. Ed fell back as the monster gnawed on his arm, pressing him down into the ground. Using leverage, Ed rolled back, flipping the chimera overtop his head and onto its back behind him. “Ed Elric, youngest State Alchemist in history. And my brother Al.” Al passed by, running after Ed towards the creature. Al waved.

David Burburry, Sapphire Alchemist, blanched. So much for his grandiose introduction.
He started to run after the other two, but stopped and jerked back. “Hey! What about the girls?” he shouted
Ed, who was trying to hold the dragon by his tail so Al could punch him, shouted back. “What are you thinking about girls at a time like this?!”
David pointed at the place where the wagon, and its female inhabitants, used to be. “I think this chimera was just a distraction!”
“Don’t be ridiculo-”

Suddenly the mountainside rumbled deeply. The ground shook as something deep inside the mountain seemed to murmur. A girl’s scream came from deep within the cave as all movement froze on the ledge.

“Okay, maybe you got a point,” said Ed. Burburry touched his sapphire necklace and the ground, alchemising a sword. “You guys go check it out,” he said, turning the sword on the dragon. Al stopped. “No! We can’t leave you alone with this-”

“Come on, Al!” called Ed, running into the cave. “Didn’t you hear that scream? We’ll have to leave this to him. After all, there’s never only one chimera….”



Meanwhile, miles away in small town called Hissegart, a figure dressed in white entered a small townhouse on the edge of the village. The door creaked as it opened, revealing nothing but cobwebs, a beautiful home that had become a decrepid den, a fearful legend.

The figure slowly descended the basment steps to find a large cluttered room, filled with dusty books and boxes. In the middle, a large circular area had been cleared. The area was still browned with the blood that had been spilled.

“Cheerful place for a meeting, Love,” said the man. He addressed the woman sitting on a box at the edge of the circle, her white clothes and blonde hair rendered dark by the shadows. The man came down the stairs and stepped into the circle. “Odd, I expected more to come.”

Love smiled vaguely. “I’ve contacted Hope, but it’s a long journey… and I have yet to find where the new Temperance has wandered.”
The man smiled widely, grinning comedically. “And Justice? I’m sure you invited him, right? His presence here is dearly missed,” he said, with gentle but obvious sarcasm.
Love chuckled lighted. “Of course, I didn’t invite him. But he may be in the area… my sources tell me the feifdom he was ruling revolted.”
The man chuckled as well. “Too many executions?”

There was a pause in the conversation. After a moment, the man broke it. “And the new Faith? Is this where she was made?” he asked, gesturing to the decrepitude around him. Love nodded, “Yes, and that’s why I’ve called you here. I need you to find her- she’s traveling with her former life’s family. The alchemist Glass is who you’re looking for.”

The man nodded. “I knew his grandfather. Good alchemists, the Glasses. What do I do, exactly?” he asked.
“She cannot remain with her family. She is too easily spotted. Surely you’ve heard of exactly how successful the experiment was? We cannot allow her to fall into the wrong hands. Take her from them, and bring her to me. I’ll be in Central, in a warehouse on the South Side. Do what is necessary, but don’t kill them.”
The man stepped back, surprised. “Kill them? Why would I-”
“Not yet, anyway,” said Love, examining her nails. “You don’t have to kill them yet.” The man began to interject rather heatedly, but Love broke in. “I’ll take care of Fortitude, right after I lead a horse to water in Central, and have Hope find Temperance. With any luck, I’ll be able to explain the details of why this is all happening now to you there without danger of interference.” Love looked at him sternly. “I’m sure I don’t have to tell you to remain absolutely invisible.”

The man, however, grinned widely. “Ah! Fortitude will be there! Excellent! How is the big guy?” he said excitedly, walking towards Love. “Haven’t heard nearly as many legends as usual about him lately, but then I’ve been out of the country.”

There was a pause. A huge canyon opened between the two speakers. Love looked away. The smile on the man’s face slowly faded. “…Well?”

Love looked at him solemnly. “Prudence….” she said gently. She began again. “Prudence, Fortitude is dead.”

An expression of pure horror overtook Prudence’s face. “No,” he whispered. “No!” he said again, louder, frantic. He paced a little, shaking. “No, no, no, impossible. How- how-”
“He was killed…”
“You don’t just KILL the Ultimate Strength!” shouted Prudence, his whole body shaking. “Do you know what this means? He was everything to the Virtues, he held us together! What’s more, he was the only one who could ever beat Lust… the only one she ever feared.” He held his hand up to his forehead. “We are as good as dead now.” he said grimly.

Love looked away. “Lust is dead too…”
Prudence started with shock again. “What!”
“I killed her.”
“You! But- but how!”

There was another long pause. Love stood, and walked past the shaking Prudence. “I must leave now, to Central. Go at once to a village southwest of here. You will find the Glasses there. Get Faith, and take her as much under her own volition as possible to Central. Take care not to be followed, either by the Glasses or by the Vices. Beware, just as there are more of us, so there are new threats to our order.” Love walked away and began to climb the stairs.

“Wait!” said Prudence. “Just tell me- the new Fortitude- is it another Armstrong?”
Love left Prudence standing there in the dusty circle, as the silence and darkness closed around him.



Meanwhile, Ed and Al made their way through the dark cave, the sounds of the dragon’s roars fading into the distance, overcome by the incessant dripping and creaking natural to caves. Soon they saw a light in the distance, and ran ahead to find…

(( ~le cliffhanger~! :o Thanks for posting GS, and for being the only person to read this as far as I know. ^_^ Yay! Also, sadness. Post, peeps! Also, yayness! You're awesome, GS! :D Questions? Comments? Compaints? ))

GoldenSama - November 19, 2005 04:59 AM (GMT)
*twitch*

.... *twitch twitch*

Cliffhanger. Hmm. I love to write them; hate to read them. XD CLIFFIE! ARGH! >.< MUST KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO GIRLS WITH DRAGON CHIMERA AND STUFF!

And... the old Fortitude was an Armstrong? LMFAO! HILARIOUS! Them Armstrong's get around, huh?

:3 This is fantabulicious; I made up a word, but in short it means oober-cool. :D Way to go BR-san; this fic, she is good. Me likes.

Now... you make more. :D

Annnnd... I should go do the profiles for Lust, Gluttony and Hope, huh? I forgotted; but I go do now. :3

Anyway, again, awesome chapter. Much greatness. Loved it.

BlueRush - November 19, 2005 05:13 AM (GMT)
XD Sorry about the cliffhanger. Didn't want the chappie to get too long- actually I didn't want to end the cave thing until one more chapter.

*tilts head* Gluttony? You mean Greed?

XD Yes! "This technique has been in the Armstrong family for generations!" XD
See group photo I'm about to post in the other VaV thread. ;)

Thanks, GS. ^_^ I'm glad you liked it.

Kimiko - November 20, 2005 05:55 AM (GMT)
-does surprised Mamimi look- Ooooooooo! Me likey! Like? NO, I LOVE it! LIke I said, it's BETTER than pie!

HOw can you NOT love cliff hangers, Rice? I LOVE um! WHenever you read a cliff hanger, teh author just leaves you to think whatever you wanna think.

And BINGO! It's just like how we played it in New Orleans; a matter of life and death! XD

GoldenSama - November 27, 2005 04:59 AM (GMT)
BR-san, I am SO sorry I haven't done Hope yet. :/ I apologize like a million times, and will go do her right now!




Hosted for free by InvisionFree