Title: The Sidekicks: Self Struggle
Description: It's 8! We're up to 8!
Description: It's 8! We're up to 8!
GoldenSama - February 4, 2007 06:50 AM (GMT)
The Sidekicks Self Struggle
Master Soda was standing beside the Collected Shards. The Shards had been arranged on the ground and the pile had now grown so much that a picture of Teh Universe could be seen. Soda watched with glee . . . soon, he would be able to change things. Teh City, a beacon of truth and justice for everyone would soon become the capitol of a new world.
Rapid Island would become his new world. There, he would be able to make things they way they should have been. The Flan-I Knights and the Legion of Abused and Starving Obessesors Over Foodstuffs were created for one reason: to change things.
Soda had a vision. He saw a world where there was peace and everyone was united – under his supreme rule, of course. The only way to truly bring balance to the Flan and to everyone in Rapid Island was for them to all bend to his will.
Soda turned his eyes to the floating Crystal Mirror . . . a magical looking glass that floated through the air. As he watched it, he saw a floating Battlecruiser . . . the same one that CHoW was currently stationed on. He was pleased.
CHoW had been banished to another dimension by the Burger King. Luckily, Soda had found him there. Soda had made CHoW an offer he could not refuse . . . Soda taught him a very special Flan-I Technique, and in return, CHoW agreed to play things out and help Soda take over.
Now it was time for CHoW’s most important job.
The annihilation of Super Kimi and Wonder Sama.
“Woo-hoo That was easy ” Wonder Sama grinned as he arrived at his goal.
He had been inside a deep, dark earthen maze in the side of a mountain. Along the way he’d found an awesome cowboy hat. Now, he’d found a large, shiny treasure chest. With a sigh he reached for the chest and grinned to himself.
“I’d be anything the shard is in here Now I can finally get out of this crazy mountain.” Sama was overjoyed – until he opened the chest and found . . .
“A compass? A COMPASS ?” Sama looked at the blue compass in his hand and felt his eye twitch. “First a small key, then a map, and now a compass Where’s the shard ?”
Sama threw the compass against the wall and crossed his arms. He’d been stuck in this cave for what seemed like ages, ever since he’d woken up. With a huff he leaned against the wall behind him. Well, at least he was alive and not in any immediate danger.
Suddenly there was a loud bang and the wall behind him collapsed and Sama went stumbling backwards, right out of the side of the cave. Now he was on his back, looking up at the sky. He closed his eyes for a moment . . . that is, until he heard a loud humming sound above him. He feared it was a giant killer hummingbird; but when he opened his eyes it was even worse.
It was a giant Flancruiser – the same one CHoW was operating.
“That can’t be good.” Sama muttered; then a tractor beam engulfed him and the sidekick found himself pulled towards the ship. While he tried to struggle free, it was a failed attempt.
CHoW was sitting in the Captain’s Chair. The big, swiveling captain’s chair with the high back and the control panel on the side. Flantroopers were all over the room, working at various computers (although several of them just pretended to be busy since they’re Flantroopers and really don’t do anything).
“Sir We captured someone ” A Flantrooper’s voice came from behind the chair as the doors opened and several footsteps signaled that a large group had entered the room. CHoW beamed and spun around in his chair – but then he sighed when he saw Sama being carried by the Flantroopers.
“No you idiots That’s not ‘him’ Come on . . . I was going to say ‘use your brains’, but . . . yeah, forgot you don’t have any.” CHoW paused for a moment, his voice trailing off. “That’s Wonder Sama . . . although come to think of it, we’re supposed to kill him too, so go ahead and feed him to the giant horrible monster.”
The Flantrooper coughed. “We, uh . . . well, you said only feed the monster when we catch ‘him’ so it hasn’t eaten in a while and it’s got this pretty nasty stomach flu and now it won’t eat anymore.”
CHoW smacked his forehead. “Why am I not surprised? . . . Okay Throw him in the incinerator and then scatter his ashes into some Fig Pudding and feed it to Toucan Sam.”
Sama blinked. “That’s perhaps the most random form of murder I’ve ever heard.”
“Thanks,” CHoW nodded. “Now go kill him ”
“Well, uh, sir . . .” The Flantrooper coughed again.
“What now?” CHoW sighed.
“We only run the incinerator on Thursdays and Tuesdays.” The Flantrooper reminded his boss.
CHoW hung his head in annoyance and frustration. “Well, what CAN we do to him?”
Sama grinned. “How about letting me go?”
“You. Quiet.” CHoW pointed at him. “I asked you a question random flantrooper.”
The Flantrooper shrugged. “We can throw him in the incinerator anyway . . . I mean, he’ll sit in garbage until Tuesday, but, the smell’s pretty bad. We had to throw frank in there after that dog chewed off his leg.”
Wonder Sama opened his mouth, but CHoW cut him off with the simple words: “Brilliant Go for it. And throw the leftover fish in there with him.”
Sama sweatdropped. “Aww, Potatoes.”
“Yes Drop those stale french fries in while you’re at it.” CHoW nodded. Sama glared at him.
“You’re just mean.” Sama accused.
CHoW laughed. “No, I’m a super villain. Now, seriously, let’s just throw him in the giant potato peeler. I think we bought it just for killing him.”
“Oh yeah, I remember that . . . it was on sale from Eggman.” The Flantrooper reminisced.
“G-Giant potato peeler?” Sama asked in a squeaky, nervous voice.
CHoW nodded. “Yeah. It’s a giant machine made to peel potatoes . . . in your case I guess it’ll peel your skin off. Not sure if it’ll actually kill you, but I think it’s our duty to find out. For science.” CHoW laughed and shook his head. “Seriously, go peel his skin off. I’m going to go look for ‘him’.”
A few minutes later, Sama was strapped to a giant vertical table that pointed straight at the ceiling. His wrists and ankles were bound to the table; at the left side of the room was a giant razor blade connected to a machine, while on the right side was a group of three Flantroopers standing by a large lever. He wondered where CHoW had put his awesome cowboy hat, which had been stolen along with his Flansabers.
“So, check it out dude. When we throw the switch, that giant razor will shoot by and shave your skin off.” The Flantrooper informed Sama. “The three of us have a bet on how long it takes you to bleed to death. Do me a solid and try to hold out forty five minutes, okay?”
Sama made a whimpering noise in response. Then he turned his head to look at the giant razor blade again, and as he did he noticed someone standing in the doorway. The person’s identity was obscured by a large cloak and hood; but Sama noticed the person slip into the room and approach the Flantrooper standing in the back of the pack.
The person grabbed the flantrooper from behind, covering his mouth and then stabbed him with a icy-blue flansaber. In a swift motion, the person snuck up and took out the second one in the same way. Then with a single swing he cut the head off the third one’s shoulders. All of this was done in a matter of seconds, and with complete silence.
“Dude That was awesome ” Sama yelled loudly.
“OH COME ON ” The person stomped his foot. “Didn’t you see the STEALTH ?”
Sama sweat dropped. The person shook his head and muttered something; but he quickly ran up to the table Sama was strapped to and freed him with a few quick slashes of his flansaber. Once Sama was freed, he rubbed his sore wrists and turned to the person with a happy – but somewhat skeptic look in his eyes.
“Who are you?” Sama asked.
“No time Thanks to your shouting CHoW’s going to know something’s up and he’ll probably activate a trap.” The person snapped. “Here, take these! I got them back for you!” He tossed Sama his flansabers.
Sama was happy to get them back, but he pouted a bit. “Couldn’t you have stolen my hat back, too?”
“I told you, no time!” The mysterious person replied.
Sama followed him into the hallway – it was long, narrow and surprisingly round. Sama looked at the ceiling and walls and thought to himself: ‘They don’t make enough perfectly round hallways anymore.’
Then there was a rumbling and Sama looked over his shoulder – he saw giant metal ball rolling down the hallway.
“Oh, that’s why.” Sama answered his previous thoughts aloud.
“RUN ” The person yelled and the two took off down the hallway as the giant metal ball gave chase. After a few feet, the hallway began to slope downwards and the ball picked up speed – quite a lot of speed, actually.
The two yelled as the large death ball came ever closer to them, but luckily for them they reached a section of CHoW’s battlecruiser that had holes in the floor. Sama and his unknown rescuer could fit through the holes, but the ball was much too large.
Unfortunately, when they dropped through the holes they wound up falling several feet into a small room. The floors were padded with a foam-like material, which broke their fall and none of their bones. Sama ushered a sigh of relief and wiped some sweat from his brow. His companion, who was facing the opposite direction Sama was, did not look as happy.
Sama noticed this and sighed. “Let me guess . . . there’s something horrible behind me, isn’t there?”
His companion nodded. Sama looked over his shoulder and winced.
“How convenient.” Darth CHoW said in a sing-song voice. He was standing behind Sama a few feet, and just behind CHoW were several Flantroopers, all of whom held large laser rifles. “I get to kill two brids with . . . well, I’m not sure how many rifles it’ll take to kill you – but I know how many I’m going to use.” CHoW nodded.
“Potatoes.” Sama sighed.
“CHoW . . . you’ve no reasonable, rational or redeeming side I can appeal to, so I’ll just appeal to your greed: do you think Soda will honor his agreement?” The mysterious hooded companion asked.
“Soda? The good guy Flan-I who’s soul I drank?” Sama asked, confused.
“Yeah, not so much a good guy really.” CHoW replied with a happy voice. “As for YOUR question . . . I don’t expect him to honor our deal, no. But I do expect that if I crush that little freak with my boots he won’t be asking too much of me. Now unless there’s anything else . . .”
Sama jumped up and grabbed his blue flansaber from his belt. He activated it and held it strong in his right hand. “CHoW You dirty, evil rat You’ve been constantly hassling everyone You send your evil toucans and bees to break windows and try to kill Kimi-chan and I You blow up stuff and try to take over Teh City I’m sick and tired of it – and I’m going to stop you once and for all ”
CHoW always wore the dark Vader-esque helmet, but Sama was able to hear what sounded like a yawn. His eye twitched when he heard that.
“I’m not kidding I’m going to go all-out crazy and kick your ass ” Sama stated heroically.
This time CHoW was actually laughing. “You’re funny. That’s funny.”
Sama glared at him. He extended his arm, closed his eyes and clutched his free hand into a fist in front of his heart. “You fool You don’t understand anything. I know I’ll win, because I’m the good guy, and the good guy always triumphs over the evil fiend. That’s just the way things are, the way things have always been and the way things will always be.”
“Open your eyes.” CHoW replied, snickering.
Sama opened his eyes . . . that’s when he looked at his extended right arm.
Or at least what had been his extended right arm. It looked the same, except everything from the elbow down was now sitting on the floor a few feet away from Sama. His eyes widened and he realized that CHoW had cut his arm off while he was talking. “O-OUCH KA BIBBLE OH FRIGGIN’ FRENCH FRIES ”
Sama yelled loudly and started flailing about the room, screaming and clenching his eyes shut. His mysterious companion shook his head.
CHoW darted forward, he was getting serious. He slashed at Sama’s companion, but the mysterious man blocked it with his own Flansaber and then shot CHoW with a fist full of lightning. CHoW was zapped, his helmet began to glow blue and he stumbled backwards onto the ground.
The companion spun around and shot several of the Flantroopers with his lightning and then he ran over, grabbed Sama by the arm (the attached one) and ran to the door of the battlecruiser. He opened it with the flan and jumped out the side, taking Sama with him.
CHoW got back to his feet and slammed his fist against the wall. “GO AFTER THEM Catch them KILL THEM Whatever you do just DO NOT LET THEM ESCAPE ”
The flantrooper sweat dropped. “Sir . . . they already escaped.”
Darth CHoW slapped his head. “I hate you all so very, very much.”
Maybe it was the fact that he’d lost an arm, or maybe it was jumping out of a battlecruiser and going through the thin air; but Sama had passed out. When he regained consciousness, he was on the ground. He was lying on a rock in the middle of a lake. He sat up and rubbed his head – or at least he tried. When he remembered that he’d lost an arm.
“POTATOES SPUDS FRIES MASHED ” Sama was yelling and shaking his arm.
“Dude, shut up. You’ll be okay.”
Sama looked up and noticed the man from before. He was starting to get annoyed, so he jumped up and yelled loudly. “Okay I want some answers Who are you, where are we, what’s going on and WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’LL BE OKAY, I LOST A FRIGGIN’ ARM ”
“I’m going to answer on the condition that you shut up.” The mysterious companion threw his hood off, which revealed his face. Sama’s jaw dropped.
“Maybe I’m hallucinating from blood loss, but . . . RUSH ?” Sama yelled loudly.
Rush was standing in front of him, his arms crossed. “Number one, the flansaber burnt your arm so it didn’t bleed, second of all, yes, it’s me. Though now that I think about it we were never properly introduced when one of us wasn’t evil.”
Sama blinked. “Oh yeah . . . that’s weird. But seriously WHAT THE HECK, MAN ?”
Rush rubbed his neck. “It’s Master Soda. When CHoW agreed to help him, he taught CHoW a technique to split himself into two parts . . . if it worked correctly, then one half would return to the other upon that half’s death . . . but it didn’t work right. We split between ‘good’ and ‘evil’ . . . and death won’t put us back together.”
Wonder Sama was a bit confused. “Oh. Well . . . that . . . uh . . . that sucks.”
“Especially considering the longer we’re apart, the better the chances are that we’ll become completely unstable and our very genetic makeup will be unraveled, essentially causing us to cease to exist.” Rush explained.
Sama looked at the water around the small rock. He shook his head. “Then why would he try to kill you?”
“Because Soda promises to make him stable if he destroys Kimi.” The first sidekick told the second.
“So, how come you saved me?” Sama asked.
Rush shrugged. “Because Kimi’s training is almost over . . . we have to get there before she’s done, or else.”
Sama blinked. “Kimi’s training? Where?”
Rush shook his head. “Not important right now . . . right now we have to make sure you stay alive.”
At this, Sama felt his eye twitch. “You said I wouldn’t bleed to death ”
Rush nodded. “You won’t BLEED to death . . . but that doesn’t mean you’re not going to die.”
Sama was liking this conversation less and less by the second. He opened his mouth to speak, but Rush beat him to it.
“Pay attention, because this is what’s going to save your life.” Rush told him, and his voice became deadly serious. “This lake is special. There’s a lady who lives in it. If you can complete her test, she’ll reward you by healing you – and by opening a portal that will allow us to go find Kimi and warn her about all this. Then maybe we can stop Soda.”
“You expect me to believe there’s some woman living in a lake?” Sama would have crossed his arms, but when he tried he realized the obvious problem with this idea and sighed. “Yeah, okay, bring on the water woman.”
“She’s right behind you.” Rush pointed. Sama blinked and looked over his shoulder . . . every time he’d done this all day he’d gotten nasty surprises; this was different. He saw a beautiful woman with blue hair that shimmered with light.
“I am the Lady of the Lake.” She said, looking at Sama.
“Okay.” Sama was a little freaked out. “Can you fix my arm, now?”
“No.” The Lady replied.
At this, both Rush and Sama blinked. “Hang on, we had a deal!” Rush yelled loudly.
“I will do nothing unless you can pass a test.” The Lady responded. “You must survive a waterspout. It will rise you into the air and spin you around until you’ve either drowned or been thrown to your deaths. If you survive, then I will help you.”
Sama sweat dropped. “Sometimes this job sucks.”
The lady did not wait for their response, instead she clapped her hands and water sprang up from the lake, surrounding both Rush and Sama and lifting them several hundred feet into the air. They were tossed around violently in the waterspout.
“Heheheh . . . I just love messing with people!” The Lady laughed. The waterspout slowly brought them back to the ground, setting them down gently. “I’m just screwing around, I’ll help you out kid!”
She clapped her hands again and a blast of water hit Sama’s arm.
“Hey boss, where’d that guy’s arm go?” The Flantrooper asked.
“I don’t know . . . and honestly, as long as it’s not in the kitchen, I don’t care.” CHoW replied.
“I was going to use it for a chew toy for the horrible monster once he get’s his appetite back.” The Flantrooper replied.
Sama’s arm was suddenly re-attached and he felt better than ever before. He was jumping about, wiggling his fingers to make sure everything was connected properly. Rush, meanwhile, looked to the woman.
“Who are you?” He asked.
“You know me, I’m the lady of the lake.” She replied.
“No . . . I mean, really.” Rush crossed his arms.
“I’m water. Soda and I were once lovers . . . but we had a fight and he hasn’t called in years! So I’m going to help you as long as you promise he’ll get his ass kicked.” Water replied with a maniac grin.
“Yeah . . . sure. So, can you take us to where Kimi is?” Rush asked.
“I will send YOU to where Kimi is.” Water replied. “Your friend must find the Shard of Teh Universe before he can go.”
Sama ran over at this and nodded. “Hey! I can do it . . . maybe I’ll even get my hat back.”
“Actually . . .” Rush began to say. However, before Rush could finish speaking, there was a horrible flash of light. The flash that comes from a laser hitting the ground.
Sama and Rush covered their eyes . . . when they had moved their hands and the smoke cleared, Water was gone. Above them was the humming sound of CHoW’s battlecruiser. Rush gulped as he looked up at the giant ship.
“That’s not good,” Rush muttered. “I didn’t expect him to catch up with us.”
“Meh, he’s an idiot – ah, no offense – we can take him!” Sama declared bravely.
“Probably . . . but that’s something I’ll have to do alone.” Rush announced, and as he did so he reached into his shirt and extracted, of all things, the shard of Teh Universe.
“Where’d you get that?” Sama asked at once.
“CHoW had it. I stole it on his ship when I stole your flansabers back.” Rush smirked to himself. “I’m not meant to find it, so when I touch it, nothing happens. When you touch it, you’ll go back . . . unfortunately, when you go back, you won’t be able to warn Kimi.”
“. . . So then what will happen?” Sama asked.
“No time,” Rush quoted himself from before. “You take the Shard and get going. I’m going to stay here and deal with CHoW . . . once and for all. If Kimi succeeds, I’ll see you both soon. If she doesn’t . . . well, then we’re all dead.”
Sama nodded, he took the shard and disappeared in a flash of light. Rush turned towards the ship, and he knew CHoW could see him onboard.
“Let’s get this over with.”
The next one will be Kimi And then . . . mwahahahaha; the finale
Master Soda was standing beside the Collected Shards. The Shards had been arranged on the ground and the pile had now grown so much that a picture of Teh Universe could be seen. Soda watched with glee . . . soon, he would be able to change things. Teh City, a beacon of truth and justice for everyone would soon become the capitol of a new world.
Rapid Island would become his new world. There, he would be able to make things they way they should have been. The Flan-I Knights and the Legion of Abused and Starving Obessesors Over Foodstuffs were created for one reason: to change things.
Soda had a vision. He saw a world where there was peace and everyone was united – under his supreme rule, of course. The only way to truly bring balance to the Flan and to everyone in Rapid Island was for them to all bend to his will.
Soda turned his eyes to the floating Crystal Mirror . . . a magical looking glass that floated through the air. As he watched it, he saw a floating Battlecruiser . . . the same one that CHoW was currently stationed on. He was pleased.
CHoW had been banished to another dimension by the Burger King. Luckily, Soda had found him there. Soda had made CHoW an offer he could not refuse . . . Soda taught him a very special Flan-I Technique, and in return, CHoW agreed to play things out and help Soda take over.
Now it was time for CHoW’s most important job.
The annihilation of Super Kimi and Wonder Sama.
“Woo-hoo That was easy ” Wonder Sama grinned as he arrived at his goal.
He had been inside a deep, dark earthen maze in the side of a mountain. Along the way he’d found an awesome cowboy hat. Now, he’d found a large, shiny treasure chest. With a sigh he reached for the chest and grinned to himself.
“I’d be anything the shard is in here Now I can finally get out of this crazy mountain.” Sama was overjoyed – until he opened the chest and found . . .
“A compass? A COMPASS ?” Sama looked at the blue compass in his hand and felt his eye twitch. “First a small key, then a map, and now a compass Where’s the shard ?”
Sama threw the compass against the wall and crossed his arms. He’d been stuck in this cave for what seemed like ages, ever since he’d woken up. With a huff he leaned against the wall behind him. Well, at least he was alive and not in any immediate danger.
Suddenly there was a loud bang and the wall behind him collapsed and Sama went stumbling backwards, right out of the side of the cave. Now he was on his back, looking up at the sky. He closed his eyes for a moment . . . that is, until he heard a loud humming sound above him. He feared it was a giant killer hummingbird; but when he opened his eyes it was even worse.
It was a giant Flancruiser – the same one CHoW was operating.
“That can’t be good.” Sama muttered; then a tractor beam engulfed him and the sidekick found himself pulled towards the ship. While he tried to struggle free, it was a failed attempt.
CHoW was sitting in the Captain’s Chair. The big, swiveling captain’s chair with the high back and the control panel on the side. Flantroopers were all over the room, working at various computers (although several of them just pretended to be busy since they’re Flantroopers and really don’t do anything).
“Sir We captured someone ” A Flantrooper’s voice came from behind the chair as the doors opened and several footsteps signaled that a large group had entered the room. CHoW beamed and spun around in his chair – but then he sighed when he saw Sama being carried by the Flantroopers.
“No you idiots That’s not ‘him’ Come on . . . I was going to say ‘use your brains’, but . . . yeah, forgot you don’t have any.” CHoW paused for a moment, his voice trailing off. “That’s Wonder Sama . . . although come to think of it, we’re supposed to kill him too, so go ahead and feed him to the giant horrible monster.”
The Flantrooper coughed. “We, uh . . . well, you said only feed the monster when we catch ‘him’ so it hasn’t eaten in a while and it’s got this pretty nasty stomach flu and now it won’t eat anymore.”
CHoW smacked his forehead. “Why am I not surprised? . . . Okay Throw him in the incinerator and then scatter his ashes into some Fig Pudding and feed it to Toucan Sam.”
Sama blinked. “That’s perhaps the most random form of murder I’ve ever heard.”
“Thanks,” CHoW nodded. “Now go kill him ”
“Well, uh, sir . . .” The Flantrooper coughed again.
“What now?” CHoW sighed.
“We only run the incinerator on Thursdays and Tuesdays.” The Flantrooper reminded his boss.
CHoW hung his head in annoyance and frustration. “Well, what CAN we do to him?”
Sama grinned. “How about letting me go?”
“You. Quiet.” CHoW pointed at him. “I asked you a question random flantrooper.”
The Flantrooper shrugged. “We can throw him in the incinerator anyway . . . I mean, he’ll sit in garbage until Tuesday, but, the smell’s pretty bad. We had to throw frank in there after that dog chewed off his leg.”
Wonder Sama opened his mouth, but CHoW cut him off with the simple words: “Brilliant Go for it. And throw the leftover fish in there with him.”
Sama sweatdropped. “Aww, Potatoes.”
“Yes Drop those stale french fries in while you’re at it.” CHoW nodded. Sama glared at him.
“You’re just mean.” Sama accused.
CHoW laughed. “No, I’m a super villain. Now, seriously, let’s just throw him in the giant potato peeler. I think we bought it just for killing him.”
“Oh yeah, I remember that . . . it was on sale from Eggman.” The Flantrooper reminisced.
“G-Giant potato peeler?” Sama asked in a squeaky, nervous voice.
CHoW nodded. “Yeah. It’s a giant machine made to peel potatoes . . . in your case I guess it’ll peel your skin off. Not sure if it’ll actually kill you, but I think it’s our duty to find out. For science.” CHoW laughed and shook his head. “Seriously, go peel his skin off. I’m going to go look for ‘him’.”
A few minutes later, Sama was strapped to a giant vertical table that pointed straight at the ceiling. His wrists and ankles were bound to the table; at the left side of the room was a giant razor blade connected to a machine, while on the right side was a group of three Flantroopers standing by a large lever. He wondered where CHoW had put his awesome cowboy hat, which had been stolen along with his Flansabers.
“So, check it out dude. When we throw the switch, that giant razor will shoot by and shave your skin off.” The Flantrooper informed Sama. “The three of us have a bet on how long it takes you to bleed to death. Do me a solid and try to hold out forty five minutes, okay?”
Sama made a whimpering noise in response. Then he turned his head to look at the giant razor blade again, and as he did he noticed someone standing in the doorway. The person’s identity was obscured by a large cloak and hood; but Sama noticed the person slip into the room and approach the Flantrooper standing in the back of the pack.
The person grabbed the flantrooper from behind, covering his mouth and then stabbed him with a icy-blue flansaber. In a swift motion, the person snuck up and took out the second one in the same way. Then with a single swing he cut the head off the third one’s shoulders. All of this was done in a matter of seconds, and with complete silence.
“Dude That was awesome ” Sama yelled loudly.
“OH COME ON ” The person stomped his foot. “Didn’t you see the STEALTH ?”
Sama sweat dropped. The person shook his head and muttered something; but he quickly ran up to the table Sama was strapped to and freed him with a few quick slashes of his flansaber. Once Sama was freed, he rubbed his sore wrists and turned to the person with a happy – but somewhat skeptic look in his eyes.
“Who are you?” Sama asked.
“No time Thanks to your shouting CHoW’s going to know something’s up and he’ll probably activate a trap.” The person snapped. “Here, take these! I got them back for you!” He tossed Sama his flansabers.
Sama was happy to get them back, but he pouted a bit. “Couldn’t you have stolen my hat back, too?”
“I told you, no time!” The mysterious person replied.
Sama followed him into the hallway – it was long, narrow and surprisingly round. Sama looked at the ceiling and walls and thought to himself: ‘They don’t make enough perfectly round hallways anymore.’
Then there was a rumbling and Sama looked over his shoulder – he saw giant metal ball rolling down the hallway.
“Oh, that’s why.” Sama answered his previous thoughts aloud.
“RUN ” The person yelled and the two took off down the hallway as the giant metal ball gave chase. After a few feet, the hallway began to slope downwards and the ball picked up speed – quite a lot of speed, actually.
The two yelled as the large death ball came ever closer to them, but luckily for them they reached a section of CHoW’s battlecruiser that had holes in the floor. Sama and his unknown rescuer could fit through the holes, but the ball was much too large.
Unfortunately, when they dropped through the holes they wound up falling several feet into a small room. The floors were padded with a foam-like material, which broke their fall and none of their bones. Sama ushered a sigh of relief and wiped some sweat from his brow. His companion, who was facing the opposite direction Sama was, did not look as happy.
Sama noticed this and sighed. “Let me guess . . . there’s something horrible behind me, isn’t there?”
His companion nodded. Sama looked over his shoulder and winced.
“How convenient.” Darth CHoW said in a sing-song voice. He was standing behind Sama a few feet, and just behind CHoW were several Flantroopers, all of whom held large laser rifles. “I get to kill two brids with . . . well, I’m not sure how many rifles it’ll take to kill you – but I know how many I’m going to use.” CHoW nodded.
“Potatoes.” Sama sighed.
“CHoW . . . you’ve no reasonable, rational or redeeming side I can appeal to, so I’ll just appeal to your greed: do you think Soda will honor his agreement?” The mysterious hooded companion asked.
“Soda? The good guy Flan-I who’s soul I drank?” Sama asked, confused.
“Yeah, not so much a good guy really.” CHoW replied with a happy voice. “As for YOUR question . . . I don’t expect him to honor our deal, no. But I do expect that if I crush that little freak with my boots he won’t be asking too much of me. Now unless there’s anything else . . .”
Sama jumped up and grabbed his blue flansaber from his belt. He activated it and held it strong in his right hand. “CHoW You dirty, evil rat You’ve been constantly hassling everyone You send your evil toucans and bees to break windows and try to kill Kimi-chan and I You blow up stuff and try to take over Teh City I’m sick and tired of it – and I’m going to stop you once and for all ”
CHoW always wore the dark Vader-esque helmet, but Sama was able to hear what sounded like a yawn. His eye twitched when he heard that.
“I’m not kidding I’m going to go all-out crazy and kick your ass ” Sama stated heroically.
This time CHoW was actually laughing. “You’re funny. That’s funny.”
Sama glared at him. He extended his arm, closed his eyes and clutched his free hand into a fist in front of his heart. “You fool You don’t understand anything. I know I’ll win, because I’m the good guy, and the good guy always triumphs over the evil fiend. That’s just the way things are, the way things have always been and the way things will always be.”
“Open your eyes.” CHoW replied, snickering.
Sama opened his eyes . . . that’s when he looked at his extended right arm.
Or at least what had been his extended right arm. It looked the same, except everything from the elbow down was now sitting on the floor a few feet away from Sama. His eyes widened and he realized that CHoW had cut his arm off while he was talking. “O-OUCH KA BIBBLE OH FRIGGIN’ FRENCH FRIES ”
Sama yelled loudly and started flailing about the room, screaming and clenching his eyes shut. His mysterious companion shook his head.
CHoW darted forward, he was getting serious. He slashed at Sama’s companion, but the mysterious man blocked it with his own Flansaber and then shot CHoW with a fist full of lightning. CHoW was zapped, his helmet began to glow blue and he stumbled backwards onto the ground.
The companion spun around and shot several of the Flantroopers with his lightning and then he ran over, grabbed Sama by the arm (the attached one) and ran to the door of the battlecruiser. He opened it with the flan and jumped out the side, taking Sama with him.
CHoW got back to his feet and slammed his fist against the wall. “GO AFTER THEM Catch them KILL THEM Whatever you do just DO NOT LET THEM ESCAPE ”
The flantrooper sweat dropped. “Sir . . . they already escaped.”
Darth CHoW slapped his head. “I hate you all so very, very much.”
Maybe it was the fact that he’d lost an arm, or maybe it was jumping out of a battlecruiser and going through the thin air; but Sama had passed out. When he regained consciousness, he was on the ground. He was lying on a rock in the middle of a lake. He sat up and rubbed his head – or at least he tried. When he remembered that he’d lost an arm.
“POTATOES SPUDS FRIES MASHED ” Sama was yelling and shaking his arm.
“Dude, shut up. You’ll be okay.”
Sama looked up and noticed the man from before. He was starting to get annoyed, so he jumped up and yelled loudly. “Okay I want some answers Who are you, where are we, what’s going on and WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’LL BE OKAY, I LOST A FRIGGIN’ ARM ”
“I’m going to answer on the condition that you shut up.” The mysterious companion threw his hood off, which revealed his face. Sama’s jaw dropped.
“Maybe I’m hallucinating from blood loss, but . . . RUSH ?” Sama yelled loudly.
Rush was standing in front of him, his arms crossed. “Number one, the flansaber burnt your arm so it didn’t bleed, second of all, yes, it’s me. Though now that I think about it we were never properly introduced when one of us wasn’t evil.”
Sama blinked. “Oh yeah . . . that’s weird. But seriously WHAT THE HECK, MAN ?”
Rush rubbed his neck. “It’s Master Soda. When CHoW agreed to help him, he taught CHoW a technique to split himself into two parts . . . if it worked correctly, then one half would return to the other upon that half’s death . . . but it didn’t work right. We split between ‘good’ and ‘evil’ . . . and death won’t put us back together.”
Wonder Sama was a bit confused. “Oh. Well . . . that . . . uh . . . that sucks.”
“Especially considering the longer we’re apart, the better the chances are that we’ll become completely unstable and our very genetic makeup will be unraveled, essentially causing us to cease to exist.” Rush explained.
Sama looked at the water around the small rock. He shook his head. “Then why would he try to kill you?”
“Because Soda promises to make him stable if he destroys Kimi.” The first sidekick told the second.
“So, how come you saved me?” Sama asked.
Rush shrugged. “Because Kimi’s training is almost over . . . we have to get there before she’s done, or else.”
Sama blinked. “Kimi’s training? Where?”
Rush shook his head. “Not important right now . . . right now we have to make sure you stay alive.”
At this, Sama felt his eye twitch. “You said I wouldn’t bleed to death ”
Rush nodded. “You won’t BLEED to death . . . but that doesn’t mean you’re not going to die.”
Sama was liking this conversation less and less by the second. He opened his mouth to speak, but Rush beat him to it.
“Pay attention, because this is what’s going to save your life.” Rush told him, and his voice became deadly serious. “This lake is special. There’s a lady who lives in it. If you can complete her test, she’ll reward you by healing you – and by opening a portal that will allow us to go find Kimi and warn her about all this. Then maybe we can stop Soda.”
“You expect me to believe there’s some woman living in a lake?” Sama would have crossed his arms, but when he tried he realized the obvious problem with this idea and sighed. “Yeah, okay, bring on the water woman.”
“She’s right behind you.” Rush pointed. Sama blinked and looked over his shoulder . . . every time he’d done this all day he’d gotten nasty surprises; this was different. He saw a beautiful woman with blue hair that shimmered with light.
“I am the Lady of the Lake.” She said, looking at Sama.
“Okay.” Sama was a little freaked out. “Can you fix my arm, now?”
“No.” The Lady replied.
At this, both Rush and Sama blinked. “Hang on, we had a deal!” Rush yelled loudly.
“I will do nothing unless you can pass a test.” The Lady responded. “You must survive a waterspout. It will rise you into the air and spin you around until you’ve either drowned or been thrown to your deaths. If you survive, then I will help you.”
Sama sweat dropped. “Sometimes this job sucks.”
The lady did not wait for their response, instead she clapped her hands and water sprang up from the lake, surrounding both Rush and Sama and lifting them several hundred feet into the air. They were tossed around violently in the waterspout.
“Heheheh . . . I just love messing with people!” The Lady laughed. The waterspout slowly brought them back to the ground, setting them down gently. “I’m just screwing around, I’ll help you out kid!”
She clapped her hands again and a blast of water hit Sama’s arm.
“Hey boss, where’d that guy’s arm go?” The Flantrooper asked.
“I don’t know . . . and honestly, as long as it’s not in the kitchen, I don’t care.” CHoW replied.
“I was going to use it for a chew toy for the horrible monster once he get’s his appetite back.” The Flantrooper replied.
Sama’s arm was suddenly re-attached and he felt better than ever before. He was jumping about, wiggling his fingers to make sure everything was connected properly. Rush, meanwhile, looked to the woman.
“Who are you?” He asked.
“You know me, I’m the lady of the lake.” She replied.
“No . . . I mean, really.” Rush crossed his arms.
“I’m water. Soda and I were once lovers . . . but we had a fight and he hasn’t called in years! So I’m going to help you as long as you promise he’ll get his ass kicked.” Water replied with a maniac grin.
“Yeah . . . sure. So, can you take us to where Kimi is?” Rush asked.
“I will send YOU to where Kimi is.” Water replied. “Your friend must find the Shard of Teh Universe before he can go.”
Sama ran over at this and nodded. “Hey! I can do it . . . maybe I’ll even get my hat back.”
“Actually . . .” Rush began to say. However, before Rush could finish speaking, there was a horrible flash of light. The flash that comes from a laser hitting the ground.
Sama and Rush covered their eyes . . . when they had moved their hands and the smoke cleared, Water was gone. Above them was the humming sound of CHoW’s battlecruiser. Rush gulped as he looked up at the giant ship.
“That’s not good,” Rush muttered. “I didn’t expect him to catch up with us.”
“Meh, he’s an idiot – ah, no offense – we can take him!” Sama declared bravely.
“Probably . . . but that’s something I’ll have to do alone.” Rush announced, and as he did so he reached into his shirt and extracted, of all things, the shard of Teh Universe.
“Where’d you get that?” Sama asked at once.
“CHoW had it. I stole it on his ship when I stole your flansabers back.” Rush smirked to himself. “I’m not meant to find it, so when I touch it, nothing happens. When you touch it, you’ll go back . . . unfortunately, when you go back, you won’t be able to warn Kimi.”
“. . . So then what will happen?” Sama asked.
“No time,” Rush quoted himself from before. “You take the Shard and get going. I’m going to stay here and deal with CHoW . . . once and for all. If Kimi succeeds, I’ll see you both soon. If she doesn’t . . . well, then we’re all dead.”
Sama nodded, he took the shard and disappeared in a flash of light. Rush turned towards the ship, and he knew CHoW could see him onboard.
“Let’s get this over with.”
The next one will be Kimi And then . . . mwahahahaha; the finale
Cojo - February 4, 2007 07:07 AM (GMT)
| QUOTE |
| Sama glared at him. He extended his arm, closed his eyes and clutched his free hand into a fist in front of his heart. “You fool You don’t understand anything. I know I’ll win, because I’m the good guy, and the good guy always triumphs over the evil fiend. That’s just the way things are, the way things have always been and the way things will always be.” |
Believe It!
Ow wow Gs. I was on the edge of my seat the entire fic. I am so excited for the conclusion to this Arc.
*Realizes I have said this multiple times*
Um, just a question that I bet you will answer in an upcoming fic, but why did that water fix Sama's arm?
I bought all 11 volumes of FMA, and have read them, so I have it on the mind. I was expecting Sama to get Automail and be able to perfrom Alchemy or something.
Which would require the gate...nevermind.
Great fic as always my man. Best part of tomorrow, besides the Super Bowl, will be the fic.
Dark Phazon - February 4, 2007 07:11 AM (GMT)
Ooooh! Very nice! Almost as good as the Spoony story, except for that now I really want to read the last stories right now (though actually, from the beginning, these last three were the one's I'd been waiting for the most, so this is just added desire to see the last two). I'm definitely glad I stayed up to catch this tonight!
And I knew Rush and CHoW were separated!! I had a hunch about that a really long time ago (so long ago, I don't remember what comment made me think that at first, but I think it was either in a conversation about CHoW that BR was part of, or a conversation about Darth Rowen), then I was 99% sure after the HA episode!
And I knew Rush and CHoW were separated!! I had a hunch about that a really long time ago (so long ago, I don't remember what comment made me think that at first, but I think it was either in a conversation about CHoW that BR was part of, or a conversation about Darth Rowen), then I was 99% sure after the HA episode!
Kimiko - February 4, 2007 07:29 AM (GMT)
*claps* Superb! (I know I haven't been able to comment on all of the fics, but I hace read them and am dedicated as much time as I can to completing your request!)
Very, very, good, Sama! I hadn't thought of Automail... but I though Knuckles was gonna show up to get his hat back. XD Great job!
Can't wait for the next one... not just because it's Super Kimi's... *yeah, that's the reason, I was lying :3*
Very, very, good, Sama! I hadn't thought of Automail... but I though Knuckles was gonna show up to get his hat back. XD Great job!
Can't wait for the next one... not just because it's Super Kimi's... *yeah, that's the reason, I was lying :3*
AGodofIrony - February 4, 2007 07:31 AM (GMT)
Sama's Indiana Jones!
That was another excellent fic GS! Now I REALLY need to write up part four for Jimi and Hammah fic...
This just keeps getting better and better...and next we'll learn of what Kimi's been doing...And what exactly those Chaos Cookies do for her!
EDIT: Forgot one thing!
Eggman sold the potato slicer! But I need it for mashed potatoes!
That was another excellent fic GS! Now I REALLY need to write up part four for Jimi and Hammah fic...
This just keeps getting better and better...and next we'll learn of what Kimi's been doing...And what exactly those Chaos Cookies do for her!
EDIT: Forgot one thing!
Eggman sold the potato slicer! But I need it for mashed potatoes!
Crystal Rose - February 4, 2007 06:25 PM (GMT)
| QUOTE |
| CHoW smacked his forehead. “Why am I not surprised? . . . Okay Throw him in the incinerator and then scatter his ashes into some Fig Pudding and feed it to Toucan Sam.” Sama blinked. “That’s perhaps the most random form of murder I’ve ever heard.” |
O____O Wow that IS a random form of murder! XD
Great job as usual Sama, lots of action and Water was very funny!! By the way where is that pic from?
Very awesome! I was on the edge of my seat!
Sailor N - February 4, 2007 06:48 PM (GMT)
| QUOTE |
“Hey boss, where’d that guy’s arm go?” The Flantrooper asked. “I don’t know . . . and honestly, as long as it’s not in the kitchen, I don’t care.” CHoW replied. “I was going to use it for a chew toy for the horrible monster once he get’s his appetite back.” The Flantrooper replied. |
Somthing tells me that Flantroopers are not squemish XD Lol.
Tazzy Porqupine - February 4, 2007 07:25 PM (GMT)
| QUOTE |
| “Open your eyes.” CHoW replied, snickering. Sama opened his eyes . . . that’s when he looked at his extended right arm. Or at least what had been his extended right arm. It looked the same, except everything from the elbow down was now sitting on the floor a few feet away from Sama. His eyes widened and he realized that CHoW had cut his arm off while he was talking. “O-OUCH KA BIBBLE OH FRIGGIN’ FRENCH FRIES ” |
OW.
XD So THAT'S how it can get more awesome. Seriously, Sama, this is super great. I cannot wait for the next two, they're sure to be awesome!
GoldenSama - February 4, 2007 08:01 PM (GMT)
Cojo: ^^ Water's water is magic water. It stole Sama's arm back and re-attached it. I had thought of automail, but decided not to.
Dark Phazon: I know you knew! I remember reading you comment and laughing to myself 'cause someone had figured it out! XD
Kimiko: I had a feelin' you were reading them all. ^^ And I really, really appreciate you working on that thing that's a secret so I'm gonna randomly change teh subject: Giant Flaming Logs!
.... Seriously, giant flaming logs. You'll all understand that better soon. :p
XD YES IT WAS KNUCKLES' HAT! See the Sonic Anime based on Sonic CD if you don't know what this means.
AGodofIrony: Yes you do. :3 And yes, soon everyone shall know what kind of challenge Kimi has had to endure -- and you remembered the Chaos Cookies! Those actually have nothing to do with Kimi's story, but that question will be answered in teh finale.
Crystal Rose: XD LASOOF is pretty random with murder. That's what happens when I write while drinking soda.
That pic? It's Shirley from Tales of Legendia (PS2).
Sailor N: Nope! Not at all.
Tazzy Porqupine: ^_^ Glad you thought so! I might actually have *both* the ninth and tenth fics done today. :o I don't have much of a choice, I have work tomorrow! *I can still start the RP tomorrow, just won't have time to write*
THANK YOU ALL FOR READING. ^_^
Dark Phazon: I know you knew! I remember reading you comment and laughing to myself 'cause someone had figured it out! XD
Kimiko: I had a feelin' you were reading them all. ^^ And I really, really appreciate you working on that thing that's a secret so I'm gonna randomly change teh subject: Giant Flaming Logs!
.... Seriously, giant flaming logs. You'll all understand that better soon. :p
XD YES IT WAS KNUCKLES' HAT! See the Sonic Anime based on Sonic CD if you don't know what this means.
AGodofIrony: Yes you do. :3 And yes, soon everyone shall know what kind of challenge Kimi has had to endure -- and you remembered the Chaos Cookies! Those actually have nothing to do with Kimi's story, but that question will be answered in teh finale.
Crystal Rose: XD LASOOF is pretty random with murder. That's what happens when I write while drinking soda.
That pic? It's Shirley from Tales of Legendia (PS2).
Sailor N: Nope! Not at all.
Tazzy Porqupine: ^_^ Glad you thought so! I might actually have *both* the ninth and tenth fics done today. :o I don't have much of a choice, I have work tomorrow! *I can still start the RP tomorrow, just won't have time to write*
THANK YOU ALL FOR READING. ^_^
Dark Phazon - February 4, 2007 09:04 PM (GMT)
| QUOTE (GoldenSama @ Feb 4 2007, 03:01 PM) |
| Giant Flaming Logs! |
XD
Funny thing: Because I watched the movie UHF yesterday afternoon, during the whole ball-chase thing, I first thought of UHF instead of Indiana Jones. (Well, at least I thought that was funny... :p )
And 2 fics today?? Awesome (especially since today is an awful day for TV entertainment, with everyone scared of competing with the Super Bowl, and 3/4 of the stuff surrounding the super bowl not actually being entertaining... maybe a quarter of the commercials, and the game {usually} are the only real good parts of the super bowl...)
Cojo - February 4, 2007 09:07 PM (GMT)
Honestly I'm looking forward to the new Fics, more than I am the Super Bowl.
Colts Vs Bears.
Honestly couldn't care less.
But a possible 2 Sk and Ws?? Highlight of the day.
Colts Vs Bears.
Honestly couldn't care less.
But a possible 2 Sk and Ws?? Highlight of the day.
AGodofIrony - February 4, 2007 09:09 PM (GMT)
Super Kimi and Wonder Sama > Super Bowl
Don't need to be a math whiz to figure that one out! Though the commercials are usually pretty funny...
And yes, two in one day? YAY!!!
Don't need to be a math whiz to figure that one out! Though the commercials are usually pretty funny...
And yes, two in one day? YAY!!!
Kimiko - February 4, 2007 09:13 PM (GMT)
"I even paid to have our commerical aired during the SUper Bowl!"
"That's great!"
"... not on the same channel, of course."
XD I don't like football, but I LOVE SK&WS, so 2 fics is great!
EDIT: XD! LOGGED! *I<3Abridged*
"That's great!"
"... not on the same channel, of course."
XD I don't like football, but I LOVE SK&WS, so 2 fics is great!
EDIT: XD! LOGGED! *I<3Abridged*
GoldenSama - February 4, 2007 10:27 PM (GMT)
XD
To know that the prospect of SK&WS is more looked forward to than the Super Bowl is pretty awesome.
And it's inspiring and so I shall work very hard and not be distracted by the distracts of Wiki or Google or Jeeves or anything else on the internet!
It shall all get done! Yes!
'cides... I have this whoooooole nice quiet office to work from instead of my noisy home. :3
XD Logged... That's great
To know that the prospect of SK&WS is more looked forward to than the Super Bowl is pretty awesome.
And it's inspiring and so I shall work very hard and not be distracted by the distracts of Wiki or Google or Jeeves or anything else on the internet!
It shall all get done! Yes!
'cides... I have this whoooooole nice quiet office to work from instead of my noisy home. :3
XD Logged... That's great
Cojo - February 4, 2007 10:33 PM (GMT)
Hmmm...
A Wiki article about Sk and Ws.... Interesting propsal Gs.
Oh wait what?
Um...yeah no distractiopns carry on.
A Wiki article about Sk and Ws.... Interesting propsal Gs.
Oh wait what?
Um...yeah no distractiopns carry on.